B&Q - madness!

[Trainfish]

Who needs gassy carbonated rubbish full of preservatives when you can have a naturally healthy drink like this?

[Newportnobby]

Does a demi-john make you half man and, if so, what's the other half? 

[tutenkhamunsleeping]

Does a demi-john make you half man and, if so, what's the other half? 

Biscuit, obviously

[Lawrence]

Just another word on Pringles. Many years ago I was an Civilian Instructor with the ATC, I was chatting with a farmer who was letting me borrow some of his land for an exercise. Potatoes were his main crop, the best ones were harvested, sent to Golden Wonder and made into crisps within 24hours, apparently it had to be done that quickly as the spud gets stressed when plucked from the ground  and their sugar levels go up making them unsuitable for premium crisps. Those that get rejected for premium crisps go for farm animal foodstuffs and those that are so poor the pigs wont eat them, yes you guessed it, the mush gets made into pringles and many other of these reformed potato snacks.

[exmouthcraig]

Without going tooooooo much off topic here, @Lawrence and anyone else remotely bothered  we grow some spuds for McCain who in turn supply McDonald's, I could bore you with the scientific criteria that they require, because EVERY McDonald's in THE WORLD has to serve their chips to the same standard which means everyone has to taste the same. McDonald's only cook 4 breeds of potato to ensure this is the case. When we harvest in September we are pulling and sending between 1200 and 1400 tonnes to McCain at Scarborough or Womborne Birmingham for processing.  Every product they produce is out the door frozen within 28hrs of leaving our yard!!!!

[Malc]

Who needs gassy carbonated rubbish full of preservatives when you can have a naturally healthy drink like this?

My god, what is it and is the horse still alive?😁

[daffy]

Looks like some scrumpy I used to make back when I wore outrageous flared jeans and long brown hair.

[Trainfish]

Looks like some scrumpy I used to make back when I wore outrageous flared jeans and long brown hair.

That's exactly what it is although I have ditched the flares. The one on the left could possibly be used as glue but the others look far better in real life and taste ruddy lovely 

[stevewalker]

Last time I was in B&Q a guy in orange asked me if I wanted decking. Luckily I got the first punch in, but you should definitely watch out. (Credit: Viz).

My wife has health problems, but the state of the living room is getting her down and she is staying in bed all day, every day. We can't continue to live like this much longer. We *need* to get wallpaper!

Why can't you just buy wallpaper from any one of the hundreds of online retailers? Or do without walpaper and just paint the kitchen?

The trouble with buying online is that computer graphics don't show the true colours of the paper. We are looking for a match with other items and you really have to see it in person to make the final choice.

We can't just paint it, as we specifically want a subtle patterning and anyway, as the plasterwork is nearly 90 years old and is not good enough for painting , three walls would have to be stripped to the bare brick and re-plastered for that.