The missing wife joke prompted my grey cells to remember something I read in Readers Digest about 30 years ago!
A lady drove to the shopping mall, parked the car, did her shopping, came out into the 10 acre car park and couldn't remember where she had parked the car!
In desperation she called the police who willingly drove her round the car park trying to find the car.
"I know it is a large Estate Wagon" she explained.
The police eventually said that they couldn't help any further and that she should contact her husband at work!
The lady called her husband who explained "That it was probably the ONLY vehicle in the car park with a 20 foot bright RED canoe on the roof!"
My mum recently had a whoopsie of a similar vein...
In the kitchen, cooking dads favourite beans on toast - in a moment of madness, she threw the beans in the bin and put the tin in the pan !!! :smiley-laughing: :smiley-laughing:
I just happend to be visiting at the time and took great pleasure in pointing out her error...! >:D
I once stared for over a minute into my washing machine, deep in contemplation. It then occured to me that pizza goes in the oven.
'It's me age mate, me age...'
I heated my cooled down coffee in the microwave one early morning after I napped in my easy chair and let it cool. A bit groggy still, the beep went off signaling it was done. I stared inside the open door for a while before I realized I needed to look in the microwave, not the fridge.
Yikes!
Soon after I was born, my Mother took me out shopping in the pram. I was left outside the shop (something you could happily do in 1950), and did her shopping. On returning home, she showed her mother the shopping, and Granny asked her if she had forgotten anything. She then realised she had left me and the pram outside the shop. Fortunately, I was still there!
A couple of days ago I became very frustrated when I couldn't open the front door. Then I realised I was using the car's remote key to open it. Sigh...
Getting ready for bed one night I took my socks off and walked into the bathroom intending to throw them in the laundry bin. For some inexplicable reason I threw them in the toilet instead :doh: Luckily it was clean in there at the time!
Paul
Quote from: Sprintex on May 02, 2014, 04:53:07 AM
Getting ready for bed one night I took my socks off and walked into the bathroom intending to throw them in the laundry bin. For some inexplicable reason I threw them in the toilet instead :doh: Luckily it was clean in there at the time!
Paul
Been there, done that on the way to the shower... ::)
At least I didn't pee in the laundry basket :dunce:
Quote from: Chatty on May 02, 2014, 03:16:55 AM
A couple of days ago I became very frustrated when I couldn't open the front door. Then I realised I was using the car's remote key to open it. Sigh...
Trust me, you are not alone. Done that more times than I'd like to remember and alcohol wasn't involved. :-[
Quote from: Ray Haddad on May 01, 2014, 08:52:33 PM
I heated my cooled down coffee in the microwave one early morning after I napped in my easy chair and let it cool. A bit groggy still, the beep went off signaling it was done. I stared inside the open door for a while before I realized I needed to look in the microwave, not the fridge.
Yikes!
Only a few days ago, I actually put my coffee in the fridge instead of the microwave to heat up :oopssign:
I was supposed to go on a Dementia awareness course last week and forgot to go :-[
I couldn't find my car in a multi-story car park a few years ago, then realised I was in the wrong car park! :doh:
Back in the late 80's, one Saturday morning I got up early and drove from Hull to Leeds to attend a revision course for my professional exams.
Sitting in the classroom waiting for the course to start, I did notice everybody seemed to have 'Auditing' textbooks, rather than the 'taxation' books I had brought, but I didn't think too much of it.
When the tutor came in and started talking about auditing, I piped up and enquired about the taxtation course I was there to attend.
"No, taxation is tomorrow" she corrected.
Well, you can imgaine how red-faced I was, as I collected my stuff and made to leave the classroom, but it was tempered, somewhat, when I saw another student following me out as she had made exactly the same mistake.
Accountants; clowns
Back in the 1960s I had a transit van kitted out as a camping van. One morning I stopped in the main car park somewhere and had a coffee brew up. t was a nice morning and I drank the coffee whilst checking the straps holding the canoe on top. Getting back in the van I set off with the sliding drivers door wide open . Half way across the car park a guy leapt out in front of me and screamed 'STOP'.
I did and my coffee mug shot off the van roof, along the bonnet and onto the ground. :-[
It of course smashed and I had to buy another one :'(
I remember going to the BMF (British Motorcyclists Federation) show in Peterborough, on the east of England showground, many years ago.
I parked my bike, after many hours I tried to find my bike...... you know the rest... there was about 3 bike parks and I couldn't remember which I had parked on. So I waited 'til most people had left and finally found the bike.
I was always doing that. One day in Norwich, before all the parking laws, I parked on a side street... and... you guessed it... couldn't remember which one :-[
I guess I won't notice Dementia ;)
I was in London on a bit of a pubcrawl and had put my luggage in one of the left luggage places
at one of the main London stations . Later that day I couldn't remember which one it was and the
ticket didn't state which station it was. I'd been using the tube and travelling about town meeting
various pals . Took me ages to work out where the luggage was, after going to various stations
like Charing Cross, Victoria etc and getting a big Noooo when I handed over the receipt. :-[
On two occasions my Tesco clubcard has not scanned at an Asda self-serve checkout. :doh: :-[ :bounce:
Basingstoke railway station refused to let me through the ticket barrier one day when I was going to Brighton for the day.The railway staff member came and checked my pre-purchased ticket and pointed out that The Caravan Club membership cards don't work for rail travel :-[
A quick swap of cards and all was well except that I missed my train >:(
Quote from: jonclox on May 04, 2014, 09:39:23 AMBasingstoke railway station refused to let me through the ticket barrier one day when I was going to Brighton for the day.The railway staff member came and checked my pre-purchased ticket and pointed out that The Caravan Club membership cards don't work for rail travel :-[
A quick swap of cards and all was well except that I missed my train >:(
A few times I have done this, variously with my rail ticket, work pass and front door keys in any of the pertinent locations...
I discovered they cash point machines don't work with a Birmingham libraries card
Malc
Customer loyalty cards tend to engender the same response if you try to tender them in an opposition' s premises (except that the owners' involved can become somewhat frosty)...
Using one bank's ATM ('cashpoint') cards in its ATM's ('cashpoint') in another country (yes, that does make sense), can also be easily done, and can have 'interesting' consequences, especially if one is in hurry and dependent-upon the machine for train fare (with the train's departure being imminent and from a distant platform)...
Quote from: Michael Shillabeer on May 02, 2014, 09:29:30 AM
I couldn't find my car in a multi-story car park a few years ago, then realised I was in the wrong car park! :doh:
I did exactly the same in Cardiff one time. 2 multi-storeys looked exactly the same but the one I parked in had a tramp sitting next to the ticket machine on the ground level hoping for some spare change so easy to remember which one. He was still there when I went back to collect the car but the car had gone. You've guessed it, the tramp had moved to the other car park! I walked every floor of that damned car park pressing my remote fob and looking for the headlights on a Merc to light up.
I got a W H Smith gift card for my birthday. Comes as a plastic gift card and attached plastic part the same size. You are meant to separate the two parts, and use the card. Guess which part I took to Smiths, and which part I had chucked in the fire......!
I stood in the queue in the building society wondering why everyone else's passbook was red, when mine was blue. Fortunately I realised before I got to the head of the queue that I was in the Abbey National when I should have been in the Nationwide...